Alyssa Megan Yeo

Since this is my first post I am going to introduce myself. My name is Alyssa, I am 15 and I live in Toronto, Ontario. 

I made this blog to express myself because in the past couple have months I have noticed that I cant trust people anymore, so tumblr you’re my life right now. 

I am single, but my heart is taken by a guy named Abdul.

He is 19, and fucking amazing, only problem? He lives 4 hours away from me in Ottawa, Ontario and we have never met. 

I have been talking to him since the end of July 2011, so around 7 months, man its been that long.. 

So, more about this guy.

He is 6’2, Albanian, Very loving and a semi virgin.

By semi I mean hes had sex once, so his virginity is gone but he isn’t exactly sexually active. 

I want nothing more than to be with him right now, everyday and always, he says he loves me and he wants to be with me forever but I have trust issues and sometimes I dont believe it, but for the most part I do.

We’ve never fought, that is kind of good and bad I guess cause I want to know that we’re worth fighting over but I don’t want him to ever be mad at me right? 

I love him, no we’ve never kissed, touched or been together but the thought of this guy drives me insane! hes managed to give me butterflies numerous times and I can picture a life with him.. I don’t know what to do.

I am probably going to see him like mid April for a weekend.. 

This brings me to my next problem, when we meet I planned to loose my virginity to him. 

Problem? Yeah.

Last week a guy came over to my house and we smoked some weed when my mom and sister weren’t home, I have smoked weed before with guys and I did not think this time would be much different, I was SO fucking wrong.

We went into my room and we started cuddling, than he kissed me.

That kiss led to another and another and another and soon enough I was ontop of him and he was taking my clothes off and rubbing my clit and I was totally soaked, I loved it.

It felt so nice, he was such a good kisser and his touch was ugh..

I was high so I can’t remember if he was exactly a good kisser or if I was just horny as fuck.

Then he flipped me on my back and put his hand in my pants and started fingering me which felt really good since I hadn’t been properly fingered in a good 4 months.. so I was moaning and so fucking wet and I was so happy, and then it all changed..

Since I was high, I didnt realize he moved his hand, and he had went to the bathroom a couple minutes before this because he had to ‘Pee’

turns out he put a condom on a thought it would be fun if he put his dick in me without advising me..

So he thrusted and I didn’t realize until he did it again, and when I realized I flipped and punched him in the face and screamed ‘ARE YOU FUCKING INSANE?’ Right after this I kicked him out of my house and deleted him off bbm and broke down and cried for a good 2 hours.

I was fucking furious, I still am, how do you simply put your dick in a girl without asking her? The fucking nerve some people have..

Oh I forgot to tell you, I am allergic to condoms.

So for the next couple days I was itchy as fuck and swollen.

I haven’t told Abdul, and I don’t want to because I want our first time to be magical and romantic and amazing..

I do not plan on telling him, and since I didn’t feel it I’m guessing he wasn’t very big since I’m not loose..

I’m very very very cautious about telling people this so I have only told two people, My 2 bestfriends, Radha and Lizzie.

Lizzie is very protective of me and was utterly disgusted when I told her this..

Radha was shocked..

That is all for today! 

Tomorrow I will tell you some other details of my dramatic life.. 

Byeee. <3